Anne Hathaway Catwoman

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Today is a day for fulfilling promises nobody remember I made! A few weeks ago I mentioned Channing Tatum's "period-specific bedclothes" in the Roman-soldier-on-slave-boy movie The Eagle. Well now that I've actually got a copy of the movie on DVD so I figured I'd cap said sight. So that is what I am doing. Right now.

Unfortunately as you can see this scene's shot way too dark so I still can't really tell what's going on down there even having lightened up the picture a bunch. Is that some kind of old-timey jockstrap situation? Who knows. What a tease! He'll gladly wiggle his eager buns in front of a crowd of dollar-snapping bachelorette parties but he won't tell his director to turn the lights up a couple notches? Shame on you, Channing.

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--- Hey Look - Channing Tatum shaved his head. I have no idea what it's for, if it's for a role or whatever, but I want to rub my hands (or you know, my whatever) all over it, I know that much.

--- Three Peeks - DH has descriptions of a few trailers we'll be seeing soon - namely The Dark Knight Rises (which is already leaked online in a crappy pirated version, I watched it this morning but the copy I saw's already gone so search around maybe you can still find it), The Amazing Spider-Man (which'll be shown at ComiCon, and excuse me while I groan at the apparent extensive inclusion of origin story in it - is there anyone on Earth who needs to see him get bitten by the spider at this point?), and the first trailer for John Carter Sans Mars (I think that's what I'm calling it from now on), which is supposedly showing up "with select copies" of Harry Potter this weekend. I better be seeing a "select" fucking copy then.

--- Future Man - There aren't any shots of Colin Farrell or any of the other actors in the Total Recall remake in these pictures from the film's now-shooting set, but there are some amusing looks at the costumes the police extras have to wear. Very TRON meets storm-trooper.

--- Latest Final - BD has a rather extensive (that's code for "I only skimmed it") set report from the latest Final Destination movie, which I am officially so excited for I could barf. As I say every time this franchise comes up, I hope I'm seeing new films from this series every other year for the rest of my life.

--- Suicide Laughs - I must've heard about this project earlier but forgotten - Kristen Wiig is teaming up with the filmmakers behind American Splendor to make a dark comedy about a girl who pretends to try to kill herself to win a dude back, a scheme which backfires and gets her sent to live with her estranged mother. This sounds like exactly what she should be doing, so I am there. It's also kind of reminiscent of the darker edges of Bridesmaids - that character was forced by sad circumstances to move home and deal with her mother too. I sense a theme! Kristen Wiig hates her mother.

--- Hero Boobs - This is my sort of literature! io9 gathered up all the examples of Marvel movie superhero men taking off their clothes that they could think of in one hot spot destination post. Chris Evans as Johnny Storm and Captain America, Chris Hemsworth as Thor, Hugh Jackman as Wolverine, they got them all oh wait they forgot a couple which I will now bitch about, that's right. Just off the top of my head they left off Thomas Jane as The Punisher, they left off Eric Bana in the first Hulk movie (although they do give love to Ed Norton in the last film), and they left off Daniel Cudmore as Colossus in X2.

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... in theaters and the closest I ever came to reviewing it was, shockingly, one time mentioning the above moment with Channing in the finest of period-specific fur bedclothes. Huh. I can scarcely remember the movie now, these few months later. I recall Tahar Rahim showing some needed presence under barbarian war-paint and Jamie Bell getting into an extended kerfuffle wearing nothing but low-slung leather pants. Anyway it's out on DVD today so all this can be yours, the end!
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--- Terminate This - Caught the last ten minutes of the first Terminator on TV last night - I say this with total affection in my heart, but what a cheese-fest! I'd forgotten. When Linda Hamilton - man I miss Linda Hamilton; I guess it's hard to roll out of bed when your bed is made out of billion dollar bills from Jim Cameron's stash - says, "You're terminated!" to the robot as she crushes him I watched my eyes roll right across the room. Anyway more blather about the upcoming reboot over here; apparently it'll be some sort of time-fracture plot a la JJ Abrams Star Trek, which does make sense. They want pretty pretty block of wood Paul Walker for the Michael Biehn role.

--- Song Bird - James Franco is releasing an album. I'd thought he learned his lesson from the Oscars. I guess not.

--- This Bites - Sharks are the new Truman Capotes! Stale Popcorn offers up the trailers for the similarly plotted (or should I say "plotted") Bait 3D and Shark Night 3D, the latter which is so abysmal a trailer I've refrained from commenting upon it yet. It's from the director of Final Destination 2 and has murderous sharks in three-dee - I should be commenting upon it!

--- Frosty Reception - Joe offers up ten thoughts on X-Men: Muppet Babies, all of which sound sound to my ears if I might be ever so slightly less enthusiastic. But I wholeheartedly agree with his endorsement of January Jones take on Emma Frost, as well as the striking resemblance between Banshee and Ron Weasley, which kept freaking me out.

--- Jonze-ing - Spike Jonze's new animated short film will be playing before every movie for the next two weeks at the IFC Center here in NY. Shame that this is what it takes to maybe force me to see the new Godard movie, but there it is.

--- Two By Two - Darren Aronofsky really wants to make his Noah and the Ark movie next, apparently. I will take whatever he wants to give me, so okay. Robes and sandals and two of every animal it is.

--- Re Up - Chris O'Dowd, who won our hearts and therefore our loins with his adorable accented police officer in Bridesmaids, has joined the cast of Judd Apatow's Knocked Up spin-off movie. But then, so has Charlene Yi.

--- Slave Wrangler - It's looking more and more like Leonardo Dicaprio will take the role of the lead villain in Quentin Tarantino's Django Unchained, while it's looking less and less like WIll SMith will take the lead role of Django.

--- Space Jockeys - For a good long while Jake Gyllenhaal was attached to Doug Liman's Moon movie - he disassociated himself from the project awhile ago since the film was taking forever to get off the ground, and went and made his sci-fi movie Source Code instead. But Liman's movie has now gotten a green-light says DH, it's now called Luna, and the names rumored for Jake's one-time role are Bradley Cooper, Chris Evans, Andrew Garfield, Emile Hirsch and Chris Pine. Cast them all and then just eliminate all wardrobe budget!

--- Not So Shy Shia - Shia Labeouf is taking the Transformers 3 press rounds as an opportunity to tell us that a fifth Indiana Jones movie is very close to happening. He's also taking the moment to get photographed with his shirt off as you see there, which I appreciate slightly more. I mean I'm not a Case of Crystal Pepsi hater like most folks; I just have my own specially arranged priorities.

--- Pride Kills - As blessedly happens every June, Billy Loves Stu's going all out for Gay Pride Month and posting delights every day, like several recent interviews with gay horror folk - go forth and read, yo. One covered in gore is my kinda Pride.

--- The Bed That Eats - Hooray new reviews at Final Girl! Stacie's reviewed Death Bed and Castle Freak! There's a pair of titles.

--- Bust A Ghost - I am going to take this rare opportunity to encourage a remake of a film I love... probably just because it's early and I'm not quite myself yet. No, this is positive. Vulture's reporting that MGM wants to have David Lindsay-Abaire, the playwright behind Rabbit Hole, write a script for their long-rumored Poltergeist remake. Better still, they're not imposing any story limitations on him, meaning he could come up with a story all his own and they'd just lazily slap the name Poltergeist on it, I guess. Whatever, he hasn't even taken the job yet, so who knows. But in the same article they mention they're also working on a Carrie remake and that's so offensive I can't even.

--- Shield V Skull - io9's got a new TV commercial for Captain America, which apparently hasn't come out yet? I really feel like I already saw it. Huh.

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I pointed this out ages ago, but Channing Tatum is good at crying. Alongside his fine physique it's why he can shuttle back and forth between shit like GI Joe and shit like Dear John - he's a big muscly ball of puffy pink eyes. Cue his latest Kleenex-filler The Vow, which now has a trailer. In it he takes off his clothes, cries, and punches Scott Speedman in the face. If only this were a romance between the two of them, dammit.

It's amazing how quickly I freeze up - 24 hours without blogging access has left my gears a little bit stuck. My timing's all off. Gotta grease myself right! Anyway I have yesterday's Way Not To Die sitting here but I've decided, since it's already approaching 4pm on Friday, to just save it for next Thursday. Try not to explode from all the stored-up anticipation. For now though, here be some links that've come and gone in importance in the past day. Enjoy!

--- First Gear - First up and most importantly, there a picture of Ryan Gosling in Drive that I hadn't seen yet, via IMDb. If you click over you can see the rest of the picture, which includes Carey Mulligan, but I've edited it down to what matters most I think. God he's aged well.

--- Speaking of pictures, The Playlist has the first image I've seen anywhere from Rian Johnson's next movie Looper. The movie stars Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who worked so magnificently with Rian on Brick of course, but for some reason the first image they released is of Bruce Willis. Okay.

--- Nosy Business - After he makes the (first?) Hunger Games movie, Gary Ross will direct a new version of Cyrano de Bergerac. Apparently "the twist" will be its use of modern social media, like Facebook I guess. So Cyrano will be a cyber-stalker, and it'll end with somebody raped and dead. Hooray!

--- G-String Apprentice - Steven Soderbergh has tapped (heh, I'm sure) Alex Pettyfer to play the young stripper that gets tutored by Channing Tatum in Channing Tatum's true life story of male stripperdom. That's a sentence I never thought I'd write, that's for sure. Anyway I am happy that the "Alex Pettyfer" tag here at MNPP is not for naught; his prickishness and terrible choices were beginning to cast it in doubt.

--- Mark's Playbook - Mark Wahlberg is reteaming with David O. Russell, aka the only director not named PT Anderson that knows how to effectively get anything out of Mark Wahlberg, for an adaptation of a book called The Silver Lining Playbook, about a high school teacher who gets outta the loony-bin and tries to restart things with his ex-wife, while having no idea he was just in the loony-bin. The last time Mark Wahlberg tried to play a teacher, we got The Happening.

--- Quite A Fright - You can watch the trailer for Fright Night over at PopWrap. I haven't watched it yet, so you tell me. Well? I'm waiting.